Wednesday, March 30, 2011

A house fire can stop your progress for a year, self doubt can stop you for a decade.


Self doubt is the triumph of the inner critic.
I've watch many movies were the hero is battling with his arch enemy. The hero is winning a few battles then there's that common scene when the hero is stopped in his tracks; He's experiencing a moment of self doubt. Something he has ignored up till then has finally hit him in his moment of trial.
These moments of self doubt can be triggered by many things:
Seeds of doubt sown:
Some one had said or done something that has caused you to doubt your abilities, motivations or potential.
Doubt of comparison:
You've looked at the accomplishments of others & thought that you could never equal or exceed what they have done.
Doubts about doing new things:
Life is (or should be) about learning new things, trying new things and experiencing new things. With that comes the thoughts that you may not be able to learn what you feel you need to learn. Or, if you attempt new things, you might fail or be hurt in some way. Or a new experience won't be pleasant or beneficial.
Doubts are mainly about survival. Surviving a situation or a process. Doubts are the way we question the possibility that we may be worse off if we try something new. We reason that trying something could make us vulnerable professionally, socially, financially or physically.
This survival instinct is there for our benefit but past experiences can distort it to the point that it actually makes survival difficult. As the old saying goes, "You have to take the good with the bad". Meaning, there's a lot of good things out there, but we need to accept that experiencing some of the bad is just a normal part of life. For every good thing, there's also a fear (no matter how small) that the same thing might not work out as first hoped. Even if later that fear proved to be unnecessary.
When we realise that doing new things are critical for our physical, emotional, psychological, relational, professional and financial survival, we will be more likely to make the attempt.

(For confidence & courage series)
Steve writes & coaches about Creative & Career Development
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